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Posted

I'm currently in the middle of a campaign against She who casts no shadow, I have a feeling this is going to be a long war, probably only ending when Nosferatu calls his bride back to the crypt.

So I'm in need of stories to keep the moral on the home front up!

What are your best/worst experiences?

  • Like 2
Posted

Good luck with your Mrs on that one.

One thing I've learned is that women want their Mum and Dad in their lives. Even if they've been shithouse parents.

Taking a stand against the outlaws may work for a while but sooner or later your better half will crumble.

I'm civil to mine. I smile, say yes, nod in appreciation and they think I'm great! During this time all I am doing is thinking of girls. Lots of beautiful scantily clad women. They think I'm partaking in their conversations ..... but I'm not.

  • Like 4
Posted

If you have ever seen s horror movie you have some insight to my relationship with the war department as we used to call them. They have always hated me and made no bones about it. They said to my wife can't you just find someone else! We bent over backwards for 20 years and saw no improvement and as they say good things come to those who wait. They are both gone now thankfully and we have been together for 28 yrs!

  • Like 3
Posted

I barely acknowledge mine. I see my FIL maybe 3x a year when he lives 15 minutes away. My MIL is over 3-4 times a week. Guess just a lot of resentment when my wife wouldn't have anything of moving an hour away so I could be closer to home when both of my parents were in the last year of their lives...because being an hour away from your healthy parents is so rough.

So, it can always be worse...

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N910A using Tapatalk

  • Like 2
Posted

It's your wife's job to right the situation not yours. The in laws should know the boundaries but if they don't your wife should be the one to set them.

This ^^^ must be followed.

  • Like 3
Posted

My in laws disowned me and refused to give me permision to marry their daughter. The reason for this was that I bought the house that my (now) wife wanted in a neighborhood they did not approve of. My wife was the main proponent of buying the house but all the blame of course fell to me.

Things turned around when they realized I had what was most precious to them whether they approved or not.

At the end of the day I really wanted my wife to gave a relationship with her parents so I facilitated a reconciliation.

The silver lining is that they now know not to medle in our life and we were expectation free to plan our weddding!

Boundaries and having a life separate from your parents is an important maturing process but like most things, there are growing pains. A confrontation was in inevitable with my in laws and my wife understood that.

There is always more to say but i hope sharing this helps in some small way.

  • Like 1
Posted

I love being single tongue.png

On a serious note though, i find islamic family rresponsibility interesting! and here's some things about it for you guys that is similar to what others have already mentioned.

In Islam, the duties of an individual are actually quite well defined. The duty of a parent is to respect the wishes of their child. The duty of a child is to care for and protect their parents. In a marriage, a husband or wife can not be forced to live with their in law, nor is a husband or wife required to provide for their in-laws. It is the childs sole responsibility and duty to look after their parents, not their husband/wifes. In regards to how in laws interfere with family, it is pretty much they have no right to anything other than the obligation their child has to supporting them. In laws aren't even allowed to go into a husband and wifes room without permission.

In Islam the family hierarchy goes

Husband > Wife > Children > Parents ie wife listens to husband within reason, children listen to parents within reason.

When it comes to matters of the home and decisions of provisions etc it goes

Wife > Children > Husband ie, The wife and children can ask anything of their husband and it is his responsibility to provide within reason

Of course all of this is completely misinterpreted by nut jobs and cultural traditions.

  • Like 3
Posted

If it is like anything I went through it will be a never ending war. Without airing out all the dirty laundry to end it I had to be the bigger person and apologize for doing nothing wrong. Good Luck.

Posted

Your wife will always see her parents' behavior as normal. You cannot expect her to ever change. It is important that you make your point made to all parties. If both sides can't see eye to eye, one side must be willing to compromise... or the subject matter must be avoided all together. IMO, there's nothing worse than living with someone whom sides with their parents against you. I'd rather be lonely, instead of living a life of resentment. Even if everyone doesn't agree with certain subjects, respect must be shown towards others. If your wife never voices her own opinion (especially if she agrees with your stance), then she doesn't truly respect you as a person. Relationship dynamics differs for every couple, and it is up to each couple to decide what they need to be happy. In order to live as a healthy couple, boundaries will have to be established for every issue. It is extremely important that those boundaries are respected as well. Let us know how things work out for you.

  • Like 1
Posted

Do you know what the penalty for Bigamy is?

...Two Mother-in-laws.

I have no advice or stories but, good luck Cap't. I think you'll need it.

-Dan

Posted

I love my MIL and FIL. My MIL can be overbearing at times, but after 15 years she has learned that my house, my rules - her house, her rules. At the end of the day the quality of your relationships will directly impact the quality of your life. If you want to be happy invest time in the relationships you have and be generous. Sometimes it's not about being right or powerful all of the time - it's about knowing yourself and the relationship with you spouse. The right balance of love, support and compromise goes a long way. The hard part is figuring out how to manage it all successfully for DECADES. Sometimes it's just not about you/me all of the time.

Posted

I think I'm quite lucky in that my partner is not on their side. Her mum and parade of men were abusive, everything apart from sexual, to her growing up and the while the physical side of it has stopped the emotional continues. So I guess it's not that my partner is oblivious to the problems caused by the bride of Dracula, its more how to deal with it until Van Helsing finally succeeds.

So far things that have not worked:

Wooden stakes

Holy water

Sunlight

Garlic

Silver crosses

The lords prayer

Posted

I think I'm quite lucky in that my partner is not on their side. Her mum and parade of men were abusive, everything apart from sexual, to her growing up and the while the physical side of it has stopped the emotional continues. So I guess it's not that my partner is oblivious to the problems caused by the bride of Dracula, its more how to deal with it until Van Helsing finally succeeds.

So far things that have not worked:

Wooden stakes

Holy water

Sunlight

Garlic

Silver crosses

The lords prayer

There is a special place in hell for those who physically and emotionally abuse children. The best to both of you!

  • Like 2
Posted

I must admit I am very lucky in this regard. I like my MIL and FIL almost as much as my own parents. I have been married for over 10 years and have not had a single bad incident with either of them. I actually just got back from a vacation in Hawaii with my family, my parents, and my wife's parents. It was a great trip. Not only do I get along with them (my FIL is my cigar smoking buddy), my parents get along with them.

Now, if you get me started on my sisters in law...we may have issues smile.png

My brother's have not been as fortunate and I can see the havoc it can wreak on a relationship.

  • Like 1
Posted

... how many times distilled was the holy water? Try boiling holy water for a period getting an 8 to 1 reduction. No sinner can withstand the 8/1...

  • Like 2
Posted

Love it.....it's the only way...bang on the money J ..love my MI

While my mother-in-law worships the ground I walk upon. I have had run-ins with numerous older women, in my short time on the planet. My own mother included.

And, my secret weapon, is.... kill them with kindness.

There is a certain satisfaction I get from being the bigger person in any situation. Even if you are not the one in the wrong.

I would send your mother-in-law flowers, with a beautiful apology note. Realising she may be going through a tough time and understand that lashing out at loved ones is sometimes expected, not always justified, but you are sorry for making it more difficult and not easier.

I am a little sick in the head, knowing that deep down this confuses them.

People get caught up on making sure the other person knows they were in the wrong. As long as you yourself know you are in the right, and it sounds like your partner does too, then it really doesn't matter.

Be kind. Always fight with love. It's ******* unstoppable.

#yourewelcome

  • Like 1
Posted

I'm normally a huge proponent of kill 'em with love. I've tried it for two years with this before accepting you can't hug a fire out, my partner has accepted the fact that one day she will have to break contact with her to be totally free, it's finding that balancing act of supporting her until she is emotionally able to, but also run damage limitation and protect her as much as possible from SWCNS until then.

This week she was more interested in thrashing her dog between nikolodian shows than reduce her daughter to tears, which is an improvement!

Sometimes I guess you just meet people who are there to test your convictions...and then some!

Posted

Good thing nobody's spouses or outlaws are able to read any of this and hold it against them......

lol3.gif

I couldn't care less if they did. :)

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