Friday Funny: Murphys Other 15 Laws

[El Presidente]

 

 

MURPHY'S OTHER 15 LAWS

1.              Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2.              A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

3.              He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

4.              A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

5.              Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

6.              Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

7.              Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

8.              The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

9.              It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone from California would be stupid enough to try to pass them.

10.           If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

11.           The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there first.

12.           Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

13.           Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

14.           God gave you toes as a device for finding furniture in the dark.

15.           When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people, who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

[Goodfortune]

Great list! Particularly liked 8,11,12,14,15. So true!

[99call]

reminds me of the 7 drunken nights.......a classic. 

 

[Fuzz AI]

On 5/22/2020 at 7:14 AM, El Presidente said:

10.           If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

 

But then you'll have 2 of either a left or right shoe, not a matching pair...

[SirVantes]

If the shoe fits, they only have it in the wrong colour.

[Drguano]

Man asks the grocer: Do you have nuts?

Grocer replies: No

Man: Do you have dates?

Grocer: If I had nuts, I'd have dates.

 

Not related to this thread except one might find it funny and I heard it on Friday...

[Chibearsv]

I love rule #8 - so true

[StogieSteve23]

13 minutes ago, Chibearsv said:

I love rule #8 - so true

I'm not going to lie to you, that smells like pure gasoline.