El Presidente Posted October 16, 2014 Posted October 16, 2014 Thanks to JK! Feel free to post other Darwin Awards Two local men were injured when their pickup truck left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch [Arkansas] on State Highway 38 early Monday. Woodruff County Deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly after midnight Monday. Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc, and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of Little Rock, were returning to Des Arc after a frog-catching trip. On an overcast Sunday night, Poole’s pickup truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men concluded that the headlight fuse on the older-model truck had burned out. As a replacement fuse was not available, Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber bullet from his pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the steering-wheel column. Upon inserting the bullet, the headlights again began to operate properly, and the two men proceeded toward the White River Bridge. After traveling approximately 20 miles, and just before crossing the river, the bullet apparently overheated, discharged, and struck Poole in the testicles. The vehicle swerved sharply right, exited the pavement, and struck a tree. Poole suffered only minor cuts and abrasions from the accident but will require extensive surgery to repair the damage to his testicles, which will never operate as intended. Wallis sustained a broken clavicle and was treated and released. “Thank God we weren’t on that bridge when Thurston shot his balls off, or we might be dead,” stated Wallis. “I’ve been a trooper for 10 years in this part of the world, but this is a first for me. I can’t believe that those two would admit how this accident happened,” said Snyder. Though neither Poole nor Wallis died as a result of their misadventure as normally required by Darwin Award official rules, it can be argued that Poole did in fact effectively remove himself from the gene pool. 4
... Posted October 16, 2014 Posted October 16, 2014 Precious stuff, can't make **** up like that Now, imagine the same scene but with the driver receiving 'head' from a girlfriend when the cartridge discharged. What technical term should be used for that?
Colt45 Posted October 16, 2014 Posted October 16, 2014 Feel free to post other Darwin Awards I recently read where someone paid money to enter a tiger cage - with a live tiger Now, imagine the same scene but with the driver receiving 'head' from a girlfriend Why not a boyfriend? 2
Maplepie Posted October 16, 2014 Posted October 16, 2014 Why not a boyfriend? Wow. assigning trans-gendered rolls to people who may easily be cis-gender?!? You barbarian! Check your priveled ledge!!
... Posted October 16, 2014 Posted October 16, 2014 I recently read where someone paid money to enter a tiger cage - with a live tiger Why not a boyfriend? Sure mate, whatever rocks your boat. The feminine was used in an undiscriminatory manner here. However, just so you know, they don't have gays in Arkansas 1
Colt45 Posted October 16, 2014 Posted October 16, 2014 Wow. assigning trans-gendered rolls to people who may easily be cis-gender?!? My bad - I didn't realize rolls had a gender....... 1
Pedro2486 Posted October 17, 2014 Posted October 17, 2014 Wow. assigning trans-gendered rolls to people who may easily be cis-gender?!? You barbarian! Check your priveled ledge!! As a hextrosexualpanotherkin identifying as a dolphin lesbian I find this highly offensive. Cis scum. Remember privilege is not a privilege 2
tjohn7 Posted October 17, 2014 Posted October 17, 2014 Thank goodness he is out of the gene pool . I once heard a story of a couple who were driving around throwing sticks of heavy grade fireworks out their car window. After it began to rain they rolled up their windows. The rain subsided, so the couple lit their next firework to throw out. The passenger, lights the fuse and tosses the explosive. Unfortunately, the window was still up, which caused the firework to detonate in the car, killing both passengers immediately. Never like to hear of people dying, but in this situation, I'd like to think that this time it was for the best
... Posted October 17, 2014 Posted October 17, 2014 Thank goodness he is out of the gene pool . I once heard a story of a couple who were driving around throwing sticks of heavy grade fireworks out their car window. After it began to rain they rolled up their windows. The rain subsided, so the couple lit their next firework to throw out. The passenger, lights the fuse and tosses the explosive. Unfortunately, the window was still up, which caused the firework to detonate in the car, killing both passengers immediately. Never like to hear of people dying, but in this situation, I'd like to think that this time it was for the best They do say 'When it rains, it pours' .... 1
leftimatic Posted October 17, 2014 Posted October 17, 2014 sounds like half the people I used to work with.
Trimming Posted October 17, 2014 Posted October 17, 2014 The old saying " Lights are on but nobodies home " comes to mind after reading this. I am thinking frogs or Kane Toads !
Ken Gargett Posted October 17, 2014 Posted October 17, 2014 Thanks to JK! Feel free to post other Darwin Awards Two local men were injured when their pickup truck left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch [Arkansas] on State Highway 38 early Monday. Woodruff County Deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly after midnight Monday. Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc, and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of Little Rock, were returning to Des Arc after a frog-catching trip. On an overcast Sunday night, Poole’s pickup truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men concluded that the headlight fuse on the older-model truck had burned out. As a replacement fuse was not available, Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber bullet from his pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the steering-wheel column. Upon inserting the bullet, the headlights again began to operate properly, and the two men proceeded toward the White River Bridge. After traveling approximately 20 miles, and just before crossing the river, the bullet apparently overheated, discharged, and struck Poole in the testicles. The vehicle swerved sharply right, exited the pavement, and struck a tree. Poole suffered only minor cuts and abrasions from the accident but will require extensive surgery to repair the damage to his testicles, which will never operate as intended. Wallis sustained a broken clavicle and was treated and released. “Thank God we weren’t on that bridge when Thurston shot his balls off, or we might be dead,” stated Wallis. “I’ve been a trooper for 10 years in this part of the world, but this is a first for me. I can’t believe that those two would admit how this accident happened,” said Snyder. Though neither Poole nor Wallis died as a result of their misadventure as normally required by Darwin Award official rules, it can be argued that Poole did in fact effectively remove himself from the gene pool. if i was in the right sort of mood, i'd ask if they were yet more responsible gun owners right up till that moment, but it would be too easy so i won't. instead, without casting rocks towards our friends in the west, you wonder how clever this bloke was - just a few days ago. a mate from the west told me he believes alcohol could have been involved. by chance, i'd suggested he was a good candidate for the darwin awards.. i'd also note that it must have been a hell of a snake. if you do get a brown by the tail, it cannot reach up to get you (only a death adder and one other snake from south america can manage that tho i would not suggest experimenting to check). hence it had to be so long as to swing around to the other arm or he did something even dumber than we think. as if picking up a brown snake (a large one at that) was not stupid enough, he gets bitten and then does nothing about it. Western Australia has recorded its first fatality from a snake bite in four years after a man in the Goldfields died days before two boys from the Wheatbelt were admitted after being bitten. The 41-year-old man had picked up what was believed to be a western brown snake last Wednesday in Laverton and was bitten several times on the hand and arm. He then collapsed a short time later when he failed to seek medical assistance. Senior Sergeant Heath Soutar from Laverton police said a large snake was spotted about 5pm in Augusta Street, about 100 metres from a local school, when the man picked the snake up by its tail. 1
cdfarrar Posted October 17, 2014 Posted October 17, 2014 HONORABLE MENTION: Jack in the Box (30 April 2014) Alive without a brain? Six days before his scheduled release, a convict broke out of a Portland jail and enjoyed twelve hours of freedom before being apprehended at a nearby Jack in the Box. The math genius had served 97% of his sentence. Out of the Box, back into the Box, a classic Jack in the Box.
Maplepie Posted October 18, 2014 Posted October 18, 2014 HONORABLE MENTION: Jack in the Box (30 April 2014) Alive without a brain? Six days before his scheduled release, a convict broke out of a Portland jail and enjoyed twelve hours of freedom before being apprehended at a nearby Jack in the Box. The math genius had served 97% of his sentence. Out of the Box, back into the Box, a classic Jack in the Box. Only in there for 200 days? Not too bad, then. Sent by the Enigma on BlackBerry.
tjohn7 Posted October 18, 2014 Posted October 18, 2014 Only in there for 200 days? Not too bad, then. Sent by the Enigma on BlackBerry. Agreed. A brother's gotta get his burger on every now and then. Can you blame him? 1
Fosgate Posted October 20, 2014 Posted October 20, 2014 Gotta do what you gotta do sometimes. I did the same thing when I was in high school with my 73 plymouth duster. Coming back from a basketball game with my girlfriend and the lights cut out. It was the middle of winter, no cell phones back then and it was dark out in the middle of nowhere. Grabbed a flashlight from my survival kit in the trunk and had a box of .22LR ammo in the glove box (Rifle was always in the car, even at school) inserted it and viola! Got us home and I forgot about it until the weekend when I told my dad. He about shot me on scene at first but then understood the situation.
ptrthgr8 Posted October 20, 2014 Posted October 20, 2014 Thanks to JK! Feel free to post other Darwin Awards Two local men were injured when their pickup truck left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch [Arkansas] on State Highway 38 early Monday. Woodruff County Deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly after midnight Monday... Though neither Poole nor Wallis died as a result of their misadventure as normally required by Darwin Award official rules, it can be argued that Poole did in fact effectively remove himself from the gene pool. It's a funny clown-on-the-hicks story, but it's not true. http://www.snopes.com/autos/techno/fuse.asp http://kwc.org/mythbusters/2004/01/mythbusters_explosive_decompre.html Still good for a chuckle, though. if i was in the right sort of mood, i'd ask if they were yet more responsible gun owners right up till that moment, but it would be too easy so i won't. Ken lives!!!!!! Awesome! I missed you, boo! Cheers, ~ Greg ~
trader1974 Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 Just about spit out my coffee laughing at that one.
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