asmith Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 I think this thread that Rob started really sums up his life as a tobacco baron. The initial thread specified 'a week as a cigar retailer.' When Rob say a week he really means four days. It all started with the enthusiasm of a fat kid in a candy store on Monday yet he failed to complete his task by the end of the week. I was giving Rob a days grace to complete the thread on Monday but alas its not to be. So I thought I would finish it for you all. Friday morning woke up usual time before everybody else and feel like ****. Must still be the affects of Wednesday night's State of Origin party (see Thursday's instalment). However I cannot appear to be weak in front of the staff and family so will tell all that am hit with 24hr flu. Go to breakfast to keep up appearances with the boys before playing with my breakfast and not really eating anything. Call Lisa to pre-warn her I'm not well, this is a ploy I use a bit so that I can go up to my office and sleep. Lisa hasn't cottoned onto my sneaky little kiddie kips I have in my office, only Homer Simpson and myself are this skilful. Arrive at office coffee waiting for me from Lisa I tell her I'm really unwell but will fight through it. She tells me to go home as I'm no good here in the office anyway. From her tone I'm not sure if she means that I'm no help today or in general, I'm thinking the later that way she rolls her eyes at me. Go to my office for a kip to prepare for the midday poker game I have to play online. I send out text to all telling them there will be no cigar on the deck this afternoon, this just adds to the 24hr flu disguise. Half way through poker game and Smithy rocks up I cough a couple of times and say 'Stand back mate I'm infected.' He too see through my hangover lie and lumps **** on me and says he was really only dropping by to say hi to Lisa and Dina. Never really liked him as en employee, drinking and smoking on the job, I'm sure he also stole from the till. I send a couple more emails and grab a Monte 2 for the drive home. Leave Lisa and Dina to hold the office together as I race out the door at 130pm. Into my Jeep stereo on full bore to the sounds of Journey and Reo Speedwagon, home in 30mins before the traffic. I have pulled off the perfect lie and the perfect week and no one suspected a thing. I can have a quick relax before the kids arrive home. What a week!!
El Presidente Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 You son of a *****. I was ill Friday!!!!!! Lisa will attest that I have never called in ill in he 5 years she has been with me (why would I.....home is a fate worse than death). I will make it up to you Smithy ;-)
asmith Posted May 27, 2008 Author Posted May 27, 2008 » You son of a *****. » » » I was ill Friday!!!!!! » Just trying to help a friend in need mate. ;-)
shrink Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 ...the sounds of Journey and Reo Speedwagon No wonder you were ill...
smokum Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 I doubt he is pulling the wool over Lisa's eyes . She would probabl;y prefer he stayed home anyway. What the living hell is a kip ? You guys say some weird ****.
Colt45 Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 Smithy, thanks for filling in the blanks. If you think Journey and Speedwagon is bad, in an earlier installment he admitted to listening to Dido while sitting alone in the dark drinking cognac.....
smokum Posted May 27, 2008 Posted May 27, 2008 » Smithy, thanks for filling in the blanks. If you think Journey and » Speedwagon is bad, in an earlier » installment he admitted to listening to Dido while sitting alone in the » dark drinking cognac..... I caught that too Colt !!!
El Presidente Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 » » I caught that too Colt !!! You people are hilarious. So real men can't like Dido! Reo Speedwagon! Chicago? ....actually...... tell me....I would really like to know and Bob....a "kip" is a nap
Ken Gargett Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 » » » » I caught that too Colt !!! » » You people are hilarious. » » So real men can't like Dido! Reo Speedwagon! Chicago? » » ....actually...... tell me....I would really like to know yeah, real men can't like chicago. jury out on reo speedwagon. what is a dido? and this s the bloke tha mercilessly bags the boss, the shakespeare of the 20th century, and yet when i get in his latest mid-life crisis car, what is playing on the system, bruuucccccceeeeee!!!!
El Presidente Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 » 20th century, and yet when i get in his latest mid-life crisis car, what is » playing on the system, bruuucccccceeeeee!!!! You peanut. I put Bruce on the system to make you feel at home. Next time I will just stack the car with empty cardboard boxes, a blanket and wine casks.
Ken Gargett Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 » You son of a *****. » » » I was ill Friday!!!!!! since when did a self-induced hangover count as 'ill'?. i think smithy is owed one big apology.
Colt45 Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 » » » » I caught that too Colt !!! » » You people are hilarious. » » So real men can't like Dido! Reo Speedwagon! Chicago? » » ....actually...... tell me....I would really like to know Not that there's anything wrong with that...... you can listen to whatever pleases you. But you have to admit...... all alone, dim lights, dido...... did you light some scented candles as well? perhaps don a frilly smock?
El Presidente Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 » did you light some scented candles as well? perhaps don a frilly smock? I am not into frilly frocks. I won't answer the rest.......
Ken Gargett Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 » » 20th century, and yet when i get in his latest mid-life crisis car, what » is » » playing on the system, bruuucccccceeeeee!!!! » » You peanut. I put Bruce on the system to make you feel at home. » » Next time I will just stack the car with empty cardboard boxes, a blanket » and wine casks. nice try. for others not up to speed here, i had turned up at the humidor without warning him and this was what was on the system. claiming esp now? and with respect, who gave me all the cardboard boxes in the first place. as for the wine casks comment, given what i have watched you pour into your body, that is rich!
First Lady Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 Smithy thanks for the laugh honey :-) Brilliant work , some of your best
asmith Posted May 28, 2008 Author Posted May 28, 2008 » Smithy thanks for the laugh honey :-) » » Brilliant work , some of your best Anything for you Lisa, I thought I was pretty close with my assessment of Rob's Friday. We all know about the **** you put up with. ;-) Although I must add you have been known to sing along to a bit of Chicago on a Friday afternoon?
smokum Posted May 28, 2008 Posted May 28, 2008 OK..I have to defend some Chicago...they were called CTA before they just shortened it to Chicago...CTA album was awsum..South California Purples is a great tune...
asmith Posted May 28, 2008 Author Posted May 28, 2008 » OK..I have to defend some Chicago...they were called CTA before they just » shortened it to Chicago...CTA album was awsum..South California Purples is » a great tune... So what would one smoke while listening to South California Purple? Or do you not smoke while listening to Chicago cause you're too busy singing into your hair brush like its a microphone? :-D
ArloGut Posted June 10, 2008 Posted June 10, 2008 » Into my Jeep stereo on full bore to the sounds of Journey and Reo » Speedwagon, home in 30mins before the traffic. » Speaking of REO Speedwagon here is a few pictures of me with the band just before a St. Louis Cardinal Baseball Game. I'm the fat guy in the lower right of the picture. :-D From Left to Right. Neal Doughty - Keyboards Kevin Croin - Lead Vocals/Guitar Bruce Hall - Bass (Not In First Picture Blonde Hair Guy In 2nd Pic) Bryan Hitti - Drummer Dave Amato - Lead Guitar
asmith Posted June 10, 2008 Author Posted June 10, 2008 » »Great pic Arlo.....great band Might be able to get a signed CD Rob? Good stuff Arlo!!
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