Colt45 Posted September 5, 2007 Posted September 5, 2007 » okay, this is something i wrote for a mag a few years ago (may have pinched » the concept of the punchline from an old joke but couldn't resist). » I can't believe I read the whole thing..........
Ken Gargett Posted September 5, 2007 Author Posted September 5, 2007 » » okay, this is something i wrote for a mag a few years ago (may have » pinched » » the concept of the punchline from an old joke but couldn't resist). » » » I can't believe I read the whole thing.......... which is more amusing than the thing itself.
Colt45 Posted September 5, 2007 Posted September 5, 2007 » which is more amusing than the thing itself. your amusement is my raison d'être.
Guest Warren Posted September 5, 2007 Posted September 5, 2007 » » which is more amusing than the thing itself. » » your amusement is my raison d'être. Raisin, date. Are we talking about dried fruits now
El Presidente Posted September 5, 2007 Posted September 5, 2007 » ‘Because’, sang Doug (every good ‘70’s story needs a musical), ‘I left my » chart in Sam Franks’ disco’! Your stellar career as a writer now makes sense
tigger Posted September 6, 2007 Posted September 6, 2007 Oh, if we're going to embarrass ourselves with tripe we've concocted... Will S. drew up a stool by the bar at Alice’s Tavern looking rather glum. “Alice,” he said, “it’s been an awful day. I need a drink.” “What’s the matter lad,” She asked? “Well,” he lamented, “I had my shot at the Jepardye show today. Was answering the questions left and right, and was tied for the lead going into the final round. The category was ‘Famous Philanderers’ - one of my specialties. I wagered all my money.” “Alexe, the host, asked the question - ‘Timothy, Earl of Wessux, is a noted cad. He’s paid ladies of the night this many times for their company for each time he's bedded his wife. Answer in the form of a question.’” “I picked up my pen and my mind went blank. I froze. I lost.” The proprietess wiped down the bar with a dirty rag, and said, “Ah, that’s a shame Will. Let me pour you some of my homebrew.” Alice’s homebrew was warm, thick, strong and foul. It had, however, stanched many a broken heart. Given courage to mended ones to go out and love anew. Lightened countless dark and angry moods. And darkened more than a few light ones. Will would only drink it if he had no other choice... With hope in his voice, he asked, “How about rum, Alice, or ale?” “Sorry luv,” she cooed, “all that’s left is me brew.” Will replied with a grumble and a sigh, “Alice, pour your ick. I knew Tim’s ***** Ratio.
jasonM Posted September 6, 2007 Posted September 6, 2007 » » » » and yes, it was gouda me to share that. » » » while on a roll, i think that 'to brie or not to brie' just grates. » perhaps we were cheddar off without that. » » and a cheesy joke from the web - » » A group of astronaughts are on the moon. They've been mining the surface, » and have discovered that it really is made of cheese. » One particular area of cheese that they're quite interested in is a large » vein of brie, and they've already been there twice, and collected samples » to be returned to mission control. » All of a sudden, the radio crackles into life: "Mission control to » cheese-base-one - we need you to get a third load of that brie!" » But the astronaughts are unhappy with the idea. They try to come up with » all sorts of excuses why they shouldn't dig any more... » "It'll spoil the environment if we take too much. We don't want to leave » this place looking bad. » "After all - have you ever seen such a site in your life as brie mined » thrice?" If I weren't many, MANY thousands of miles away, I might have resorted to violence after that one. :crying:
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now