BradNC Posted July 14, 2011 Share Posted July 14, 2011 Two nuns, Sister Marilyn and Sister Helen, are traveling through Europe in their car. They get to Transylvania and are stopped at a traffic light. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a diminutive Dracula jumps onto the hood of the car and hisses at them, through the windshield. "Quick, quick!" shouts Sister Marilyn. "What shall we do?" "Turn the windshield wipers on. That will get rid of the abomination," says Sister Helen. Sister Marilyn switches them on, knocking Dracula about, but he clings on and continues hissing at the nuns. "What shall I do now?" she shouts. "Switch on the windshield washer. I filled it up with Holy Water in the Vatican," says Sister Helen. Sister Marilyn turns on the windshield washer. Dracula screams as the water burns his skin, but he clings on and continues hissing at the nuns. "Now what?" shouts Sister Marilyn. As Dracula hangs on. "Show him your cross," says Sister Helen. "Now you're talking," says Sister Marilyn as she opens the window and and shouts, . "Get the **** off our car!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Styler Posted July 14, 2011 Share Posted July 14, 2011 Brings back memories, when I was young there seemes to be a lot of jokes about nuns for one reason or another. My favourite was always "Two nuns were sitting on a park bench when a streaker ran past. One had a stroke, the other couldn't reach" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest leanderdsilva Posted July 14, 2011 Share Posted July 14, 2011 One day a hippie went on a bus and sat next to a nun. He asked her if she wanted to have sex with him she said no and got of the next stop. So the hippie was sitting there until he got off his stop. Then on the way out the bus driver asked him "do u want to no how to have sex with that nun" and then he explains. "You can find the nun every Saturday at the cemetery praying at 2:00 so meet her there. But when u go there u have to dress up in a white out-fit and put some powder to make him glow" So thats what the hippie went and did. He got to the cemetery and said to the nun "I am your lord god and u have to do what i say! Now have sex with me" So when they finished kissing the hippie took of his mask off and said "HA HA I WAS THE HIPPIE FORM THE BUS" then the nun said " HA HA I AM THE BUS DRIVER" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
str8dog Posted July 14, 2011 Share Posted July 14, 2011 One day a hippie went on a bus and sat next to a nun. He asked her if she wanted to have sex with him she said no and got of the next stop. So the hippie was sitting there until he got off his stop. Then on the way out the bus driver asked him "do u want to no how to have sex with that nun" and then he explains."You can find the nun every Saturday at the cemetery praying at 2:00 so meet her there. But when u go there u have to dress up in a white out-fit and put some powder to make him glow" So thats what the hippie went and did. He got to the cemetery and said to the nun "I am your lord god and u have to do what i say! Now have sex with me" So when they finished kissing the hippie took of his mask off and said "HA HA I WAS THE HIPPIE FORM THE BUS" then the nun said " HA HA I AM THE BUS DRIVER" OK, hippies to the back of the bus ... driver!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vortigan Posted July 14, 2011 Share Posted July 14, 2011 The one I always remember is the two nuns in the bath.One says,"Where's the soap"?.....the other says,"Yeah I know"!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cigcars Posted July 17, 2011 Share Posted July 17, 2011 In case anybody missed my previous nun-some: Two nuns were walking down a dark alley way when two young thugs jumped out, pulled them both into the alley and began having their way with them. The first nun covers her face and says, "Forgive him, Lord! He knows not what he does." The second nun says, "Mine does." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeafLover Posted July 17, 2011 Share Posted July 17, 2011 "Get the **** off our car!" LOL. Hilarious! Didn't expect that. Will add that to my collection of jokes that I will share at my drunken cigar get togethers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZAZ Posted July 17, 2011 Share Posted July 17, 2011 Classic! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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