queensland floods, noah and the politicians...

[Ken Gargett]

forgive the touch of politics...

NOAH ARK 2O1O STORY

In the year 2010 on the day of the Sabbathin the first week of November ,the Lord

came unto Noah, who was now living in Queensland (God's own country!) and said:

"Once again, ths earth has become wicked and

Over-populated and I see the end of all flesh before me.

Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans,"

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying:

"Before the end of 2010 I will give Queenslanders a taste of what is to come in the

New Year, so be prepared. You have l0 weeks to build the Ark before I will start the

unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights commencing the middle of January 2011.'

On the last day of 2010, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard -

but no Ark.

"Noah!," He roared,

"I'm going to start the 40 days and 40 nights of rain in two weeks! Where is the Ark?"

"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah,

"but things have changed dramatically since you asked me to build your first Ark

thousands of years ago."

"Now I needed a Building Permit from Local Government to build the structure in my

yard as they say the plans look like a highrise which has amazed me."

"I've been arguing with the Building Inspector

About the need for a sprinkler system because it will be classed as boarding rooms."

'My neigbbours claim that I've violated the Local Government planning scheme and

various Council-endorsed policies, plus many other Regulations by building the Ark

in my back garden and exceeding the height limitations.

We had it nearly passed by the Council but the Labour Party's Stirling Hinchcliffe

and Anna Bhgh have poked their noses in and now the State Labour Govemment has

called the project in to further consider it."

"Origin Energy, Council and Main Roads have demanded a mountain of money for

the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions to clear the

passage for the Ark's move to the sea.

I told them that the sea would be coming to us and it would float itself, but they would

hear nothing of it..."

"Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban

On cutting local trees in order to save Koala habitat.'

"I tried to convince the Council, the Greens and local environmentalists that I needed

the wood to save these same Koalas - but NO - GO!"

"then when I started gathering the animals on my property, the RSPCA took me to court-

They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will.

They argued the accommodations were too restrictive and

It was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in

A confined space."

"Then the Greens put pressure on the Environmental Protection Authority who ruled

that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on

YouR proposed flood."

"I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Equal Opportunity Commission &

Labour Council on how many minorities and women I'm

Supposed to hire for my building gang."

The federal Deparhnent of Immigration is checking the

Visa status of most of the people who do want to work."

The building trade unions say I can't use my sons.

They insist I have to hire only union workers with

Ark-building experience."

"To make matters worse, the ATO and Customs seized

all my assets claiming I'm

trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species."

"So, forgive me, Lord, but it will take at least 20

Years for me to finish this Ark."

"Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine

And a rainbow stretched across the sky."

Noah looked up on New Years Eve in wonder and asked,

"You mean you're not going to destroy Queensland or the rest of Australia?"

"Noo" said the Lord.

ANNA BLIGH, The AUSTRALIAN GREENS and LABOR PARTY have beaten

me to it."

[Montaigut]

Found myself laughing and crying at the same time!

[Habanos2000]