geniuses at work

[Ken Gargett]

get a letter from medibank diverted from my old address. i ring to change the address - get put through to a phone that never answers. i sit there like a dill for god knows how long. hang up, ring again, explain that no one is answering that line. "i'll put you through again". but there is no one there. "i still have to put you through". but no one is answering. "i still have to put you through, sir". don't you that is a bit stupid? "yes, but i still have to put you through'. i think they may have previously worked at telstra.

then we have the driver on saturday evening. nice bloke but...

i was off to the rugby and the mob that had invited me to do a wine presentation in one of the boxes sent a limo. all very nice. he turns up and immediately gets bogged. first man to get bogged on a tiny strip of gravel about 3 feet wide and flat. extraordinary. took us 20 minutes to get him out and next morning i had a 6 inch trench through the drive and 30 minutes sweeping all the rocks back from everywhere. then he bags rugby. starts telling me that soccer is the only real football. etc etc. not going well. then when he asks, i tell him i am off to do a wine presentation, he at least says he likes wine. turns out only sweet wine but that is something. then tells me that his doctors won't let him have any but he ignores them. did i mention he was about 5' 8" and pushing 30 stone. my immediate response i diabetes. yep. given that my father was late onset diabetes and it helped kill him, i am beyond words. then he tells me he liks ice cream but his doctors etc etc. but he still eats it. can't take the fun out of life. so to speak.

then when we arrive, he gives me his mobile number so i can call to meet outside after. i offer to give him mine as well. no, won't need it. all goes well and somehow he gets me home. not before telling that as soon as i was gone, he remembered he'd forgotten his mobile so no way for me to find him post match. left it at home. so has to rush home. turns out home is somewhere outside the gold coast - about 100 kms away for non-locals. so he has a mad dash for the phone.

i am still quite flabbergasted by the whole thing.