Douglas the Crab

[First Lady]

Douglas the humble Crab and Kate the Lobster Princess were madly, deeply

and passionately in Love. For months they enjoyed an idyllic

relationship until one day Kate scuttled over to Douglas in tears. "We

can't see each other any more..." she sobbed.

"Why?" gasped Douglas.

"Daddy says that crabs are too common," she wailed. "He claims you are a

mere crab, and a poor one at that, and crabs are The lowest class of

crustacean and that no daughter of his will marry someone who can only

walk sideways."

Douglas was shattered, and scuttled sidewards away into the darkness to

drink himself into a filthy state of aquatic oblivion.

That night, the great Lobster ball was taking place. Lobsters came from

far and wide, dancing and merry making, but the lobster Princess refused

to join in, choosing instead to sit by her father's side, inconsolable..

Suddenly the doors burst open, and Douglas the crab strode in. The

Lobsters all stopped their dancing, the Princess gasped and the King

Lobster rose from his throne. Slowly, painstakingly, Douglas the crab

made his way across the floor.......and all could see that he was

walking, not sideways............ but FORWARDS.........Yes FORWARDS, one

claw after another!! Step by step he made his approach towards the

throne, until he looked the King lobster in the eye.

There was a deadly hush..................................

For quite a while...........................

Finally, Douglas the crab

spoke................................................

"F*ck, I'm pissed."

God I love this

[El Presidente]

Now fellow members see what I am faced with on a daily basis.... in the form of the First Lady

It is the reason that I have mandated no bottles of wine are to be uncorked at CZAR House before 11am.

....Leadership at it's finest

[anacostiakat]

Much like Douglas I think I would be gettin pissed on a regular basis. :cool: