the italian golfer...

[Ken Gargett]

Silvio, an 80-year-old Italian goes

to the doctor for a check-up. The doctor is amazed at what

good shape the guy is in and asks, 'how do you stay in

such great physical condition?'

I'm Italian and I am a golfer,' says Silvio,

'and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm

up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the

fairways. I have a glass of vino, and all is

well.'

"'Well'

says the doctor, 'I'm sure that helps, but

there's got to be more to it. How old was your Father

when he died?'

'Who said my

Father's dead?'

The doctor is amazed.

'You mean you're 80 years old and your Father's

still alive. How old is he?'

'He's 100

years old,' says Silvio. 'In fact he golfed with me

this morning, and then we went to the topless beach for a

walk and had a little vino and that's why he's still

alive. He's Italian and he's a golfer,

too.'

'Well,' the

doctor says, 'that's great, but I'm sure

there's more to it than that. How about your

Father's Father? How old was he when he

died?'

'Who said my

Nonno's

dead?'

Stunned, the doctor

asks, 'you mean you're 80 years old and your

grandfather's still living! Incredible, how old is

he?'

'He's 118

years old,' says the Old Italian golfer.

The doctor is getting

frustrated at this point, 'So, I guess he went golfing

with you this morning too?'

'No, Nonno couldn't go

this morning because he's getting married

today.'

At this point the

doctor is close to losing it. 'Getting married? Why

would a 118 year- old guy want to get

married?'

'Who said he

wanted to?"