Hypercaloring! Be the cooloest at your watercooler

[rudder]

Let's be honest...who isn't Hypermiling these days, it's so mainstream....so 2008!

Gas prices have increased....but food prices have skyrocketed! Why hasn't anyone brought up eating less to save $$.....until now!!

Hypercaloring!!!

Make your body's fuel go longer, and save cash!! You'll be the coolest person at the watercooler!

Techniques:

-don't run.....ever again, not if you're being chased by a rabid dog, not if you're about to be mugged on Lake street, not EVER.

-sleep.....it is well known fact that sleeping doesn't burn many calories, so sleep as long as possible. At least 12 hours/day, the real hypercalorie dudes sleep up to 14 hours plus. Sleep thru important meetings, family gatherings, and other important functions - just tell your boss or family "hey, I'm hypercaloring.....I can't afford to just burn calories like money grows on trees" They will be so jealous.

-If you HAVE to walk....walk really slow, who cares if you annoy people trying to live their lives by walking briskly (normally), they can go around you!

-Pass out.....don't be afraid to pass out, that's just nature's way of saying "I'm out of gas"

-Talk about hypercaloring nonstop, and brag about how much food/money you're saving.....it'll be the next big thing, and YOU will have been in on the ground floor!!!

Don't even sweat it when the "doctors" tell you if you don't eat you will die....you know dam well "big food" is lining their pockets with kick backs for pushing their products.

Why is it we the people are going broke, but the food companies (Kraft, General Mills, etc) are making record profits???