The Aisle Seat

[Ken Gargett]

The Aisle Seat.

Two Arabs boarded a flight out of London. One took a window seat and the

other sat next to him in the middle seat. Just before takeoff, a Marine sat

down in the aisle seat.After takeoff, the Marine kicked his shoes off, wiggled his toes and was

settling in when the Arab in the window seat said, 'I need to get up and get a coke.'

'Don 't get up,' said the Marine, 'I'm in the aisle seat, I'll get it for you'

As soon as he left, one of the Arabs picked up the Marines shoe and spat in

it. When the Marine returned with the coke, the other Arab said,'That looks

good, I'd really like one, too.'

Again, the Marine obligingly went to fetch it.

While he was gone the other Arab picked up the Marines other shoe and spat

in it.

When the Marine returned, they all sat back and enjoyed the flight.

As the plane was landing, the Marine slipped his feet into his shoes and

knew immediately what had happened. 'Why does it have to be this way?' he

asked the two Arabs. 'How long must this go on? This fighting between our nations? This hatred? This animosity? This spitting in shoes and pissing in cokes?'

[El Presidente]

New Zealand market ...Gone.

"Pommy market"....Gone

"Scientologist Market"....Gone

"Creationist market"....Gone

"Arab market"....Gone

"Gun lobby market"....hanging on by a fingernail.

Ken....you are costing me a fortune

[Ken Gargett]

and i'm only warming up!!

can't remembr having a crack at weird tom and his buddies but happy to do so if you think necessary.

[El Presidente]

» and i'm only warming up!!

» can't remembr having a crack at weird tom and his buddies but happy to do

» so if you think necessary.

Just to remind you...

love it!

we've all trashed forum rule 4 (it isn't my fault that i have a compulsion to address rob's fishing deficiencies, not that i haven't tried) so why stop now.

for the record, i think scientologists are complete crackpots, perhaps only marginally saner than the looney tunes advocating "intelligent" design, the greatest misnomer in history

:-)

[BlackFriar]

» » and i'm only warming up!!

» » can't remembr having a crack at weird tom and his buddies but happy to

» do

» » so if you think necessary.

»

» Just to remind you...

»

» love it!

I think Ambrose Bierce sums it up pretty well, "Irreligion - the principal one of the great faiths of the world."

[Ken Gargett]

we've all trashed forum rule 4 (it isn't my fault that i have a

» compulsion to address rob's fishing deficiencies, not that i haven't

» tried) so why stop now.

» for the record, i think scientologists are complete crackpots, perhaps

» only marginally saner than the looney tunes advocating "intelligent"

» design, the greatest misnomer in history

okay, to be fair, i have no recollection of making that particular comment or what brought it about but it does sound as ho i may have been responsible. obviously, 'complete crackpots' is a term of endearment. and in my defence, i am one of the few people i know who actully think that weird tom is a better actor than he is given credit for.

let me know if you have any other markets causing you problems and happy to sort them out.

may i conclude by querying, given the accusation that i destroyed the crackpot market, just how big said market was? one suspects that if it even existed, you would not have risked it further by dragging up long forgoten cmments obviously taken out of context.

[El Presidente]

» forgoten cmments obviously taken out of context.

Out of context....your kidding me

Only someone who after blasting cork closures in wine....and then accepts a two week fully paid vacation to Portugal....paid for the Portugese Cork industry....would waffle such dribble.

I have full respect for Ron Howard and his followers

[Ken Gargett]

» »

» I have full respect for Ron Howard and his followers

what? potsie, ralph, the fonz and joanie?

Only someone who after blasting cork closures in wine....and then accepts

» a two week fully paid vacation to Portugal....paid for the Portugese Cork

» industry....would waffle such dribble.

dear rob clinton,

i'm bitterly disappointed that you would stoop to such low blows. i made objective comments about the use of cork as a stopper in the wine industry and their ultimate role as nothing more than a trivia question. i was invited to take a first hand look at the cork industry to see if i felt my views were justified or not. i rejected the first offer (granted because the flights would have clashed with the world cup rugby final in 1999) but accepted the second occasion. the cork industry made the offer when fully aware of my views of their product. i learnt much on that trip, though maintain the view that cork is not the ideal stopper.

and it was not the luxury junket you suggest - if memory serves, there was one short internal flight that was not business!!

i remain close friends with several members of the portuguese cork industry and will catching up with them immediately after the cigar festival. we agree to disagree about their product.

i'm still waiting on the 'size' of your 'looney fringe' market, that i am alleged to have destroyed.

and with respect, not that you could say so in print, but you were overjoyed at the collapse of your kiwi market, if i recall. appalling treatment of our closest neighbours and friends - a truly special place on this planet (at least for trout), though i still think that the bloke who put new zealand on ebay should be knighted (fo those that missed that, bidding reached $3000, on the condition of vacant possession).

[Ken Gargett]

»

» I have full respect for Ron Howard and his followers

so much respect that you have absolutely no idea who you are talking about. would that be ron hubbard?

[Ken Gargett]

» »

» » I have full respect for Ron Howard and his followers

»

»

» so much respect that you have absolutely no idea who you are talking

» about. would that be ron hubbard?

i'm assuming that you will now accept equal culpability for detroying the scientology market (and 100% for the 'fans of happy days' market)?

[El Presidente]

» » so much respect that you have absolutely no idea who you are talking

» » about. would that be ron hubbard?

» i'm assuming that you will now accept equal culpability for detroying the

» scientology market (and 100% for the 'fans of happy days' market)?

It is all "Happy Days" for Scientologists ;-)