Blonde jokes

[crossbow]

I know you'll like these Lisa.......

Two blondes living in Townsville Queensland were sitting on a bench

talking..... .

And one blonde says to the other, "Which do

You think is farther away........ ..Melbourne or the moon?"

The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can

You see Melbourne... ?????"

CAR TROUBLE

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the

Mechanic it died.

After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She

Says, "What's the story?"

He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"

She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"

SPEEDING TICKET

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very

Nicely if he could see her license.

She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act

Together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then

Today you expect me to show it to you!"

RIVER WALK

There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees

Another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts,

"How can I get to the other side?"

The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and

Shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."

AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said

That her body hurt wherever she touched it.

"Impossible! " says the doctor. "Show me."

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left breast and

Screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even

More. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she

Pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched

Made her scream.

The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?

"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."

"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken"

IN A VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn.

She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her

Question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your

Name, can you hear it?"

She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two

New dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde

Responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one

Was named Timex.

Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like

That?"

"HELLLOOOOOOO. .....," answered the blonde. "They're

Watch dogs!"