gehrig24 Posted May 25, 2007 Posted May 25, 2007 Just got this from a friend, thought I would pass it along. Now here are the rules from the male side. >These are our rules! >Please note.. these are all numbered "1" > >ON PURPOSE! > > > > > >1. Men are NOT mind readers. > >1. Learn to work the toilet seat. >You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. >We need it up, you need it down. >You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. > >1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon >or the changing of the tides. >Let it be. > >1. Shopping is NOT a sport. >And no, we are never going to think of it that way. > >1. Crying is blackmail. > >1. Ask for what you want. >Let us be clear on this one: >Subtle hints do not work! >Strong hints do not work! >Obvious hints do not work! >Just say it! > >1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. > >1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what >we do. >Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. > >1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. > >See a doctor. > >1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. >In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days. > >1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to >act like soap opera guys. > >1. If you think you're fat, you probably are >Don't ask us. > >1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways >makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one > >1. You can either ask us to do something >Or tell us how you want it done. >Not both. >If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. > >1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during >commercials. > >1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. > >1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. >Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We >have no idea what mauve is. > >1. If it itches, it will be scratched. >We do that. > >1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like >nothing's wrong. >We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. > >1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you >don't want to hear. > >1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. >Really. > >1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to >discuss such topics as SEX, CARS, >or FOOTBALL.
cls515 Posted May 26, 2007 Posted May 26, 2007 » >1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to » >discuss such topics as SEX, CARS, » >or FOOTBALL. You should also add ordering cigars to the list.
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